Ordinary, Everyday Love

Advent Week 4 – LOVE

By Maile Soto

Psalm 33:18-22 (TPT)

The eyes of the Lord are upon 
even the weakest worshippers who love him--
those who wait in hope and expectation 
for the strong, steady love of God.

God will deliver them from death,
even the certain death of famine,
with no one to help.

The Lord alone is our radiant hope 
and we trust in him with all our hearts.
His wrap-around presence will strengthen us.

As we trust, we rejoice with an uncontained joy
flowing from Yahweh!

Let Your love and steadfast kindness overshadow us continually,
for we trust and we wait upon You!

John 15:12-13 (TPT)

So this is my command:  Love each other deeply, as much as I have loved you.  For the greatest love of all is a love that sacrifices all.  And this great love is demonstrated when a person sacrifices his life for his friends.

1 John 4:19 (ESV)

We love, because He first loved us.

Ordinary, Everyday Love

By Maile Soto

If you’ve ever been shopping with me, you know that I combat shop.  I have a list, and I know exactly how long it will take me to get in, get what I need, and get out.  I walk faster than 95% of the other people in the store and I know how to maneuver a shopping cart in a crowded aisle like I’m driving the freeway in LA. I rarely dawdle. I tell you this so you can understand just how frustrated and impatient I found myself getting a few weeks ago in a Naples, Fl Lowe’s. 

I’d gone with my 92 year old mother-in-law to look for a new sink for her condo.  We’d been in the store for over 45 minutes and we were nowhere NEAR the sinks.  We’d been wandering around the garden center at about 1/10th my normal speed, and I’d been congratulating myself on how well I was doing at holding back my normal pace. But then she sat down for a rest on one of the patio furniture displays for the second time, and all of a sudden I was conscious of the afternoon slipping away and my beach time running short.  It was 84°F and sunny, and the beach was just a few miles away!  I was heading back to 15°F and snow in Alaska tomorrow!  

Just as I was about to sigh deeply and probably say something in a snippy, impatient tone, Holy Spirit said, “This is what laying down your life looks like.” … (mic drop)

 I’ve always read that verse in John 15 about “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends,” and I’ve always only pictured the grand gestures:  the martyrs, the missionaries, people changing the whole course of their lives to serve others, Jesus dying on the cross—things that didn’t really resemble me and my ordinary life.  But this Christmas season, the Holy Spirit has been speaking to me about all the ordinary, everyday ways that we lay down our lives for those we love.  The small acts of love, repeated again and again, that demonstrate a sacrifice, a laying down of what we’d rather be doing with our time and energy.  

I’m thinking about…

• The times when one of our kids would throw up in the middle of the night, and, knowing how sensitive I am to the smell, Ed would be right there cleaning it up.  
• My dad making difficult lifestyle changes when I was 2, because it was better for me.  
• All the dirty diapers and toilet cleaning and laundry and driving and answering question after question after question that go into being a mom.  
• All the times one of my kids needed something in the middle of the night and I lost sleep to feed them or comfort them.
• My friend who prays for and weeps over her children—not just once, but day after day, year upon year.
• All the choices parents make because it’s better for their children. 
• All the times I come downstairs in the morning and the trash is taken out, a fire is made, the snow is brushed off my car.  
• I think of Marlena making breakfast for us on Sunday mornings, and the worship team giving up their Wednesday nights to practice (not to mention getting to church hours before the rest of us), and Pastor Paul mopping the floor because it needs to be done.   

I’m thinking about the myriad little ways that each of us lays down our lives every day.

And in this busy holiday season, I want us to pause for a moment and celebrate how we are loving well, loving sacrificially.  It’s so easy for us to see what we are doing wrong; it’s much harder to acknowledge what we are doing well.  If you can’t think of anything, I encourage you to ask Holy Spirit. (“Holy Spirit, how am I laying down my life for my family & friends?  In what ways am I loving well?”)

And I also think this is a great time to recognize those in our lives that are loving us well through quiet, everyday acts of service.  Who is loving you well in your life that could use the encouragement of knowing what they are doing well?

Instead of all the things we “have” to do, let’s look at all those tasks as making a choice to lay down our lives—a little change in perspective that is HUGE!  Because now I will gladly spend as long as it takes to wind my way through Lowe’s at a snail’s pace, because I’m doing it for love.  Suddenly, tasks that seemed trivial or repetitive or boring have new weight and meaning when I choose them because of love.  Just a glimpse of what it means when it says, “who,for the joy set before him, endured the cross…” (Hebrews 12:2)  There’s joy to be found when we lay down our lives for love.  

Reflect:

1 John 4:9 says, “We love because He first loved us.”  Let’s pause for a moment and think about and/or feel how He loves us.  This is what fuels our ability to love others.  If this is hard for you, ask for what you need (i.e., “Holy Spirit, I’m not feeling it… I want to experience more of your love today.”)

Holy Spirit, how am I loving well?  What are you proud of me for?

Holy Spirit, how are the people in my life loving me well?  What am I not seeing and appreciating because I’m focused on what’s not there rather than what is?  Who could use some encouragement that I appreciate their quiet, everyday acts of service?

Let’s Pray:

Father, thank you for your great love for me.  Thank you, Jesus, for laying down your life for me.  Thank you that you are coming again.  Thank you, Holy Spirit for guiding me, and encouraging me, and empowering me to love my friends and family—my tribe–well. Help me to shift my thinking from “I have to” to “I choose to, because of love”.  Thank you that you are continually at work in my life!  Amen.